Define ________
So, I don't know if anyone noticed, but I deleted a blog entry yesterday. It was a two page analysis on the difference between "define" and "explain" in the context of diabetes.
But I deleted the post (though not the actual essay, there is no way I'd be able to reproduce that analysis so it's hiding safely on my lime green jump drive) because I decided that I wasn't entirely clear what the question was.
The debate about "diabetes defining you" has been raging for quite a while. It started way back in the winter with the question of would you choose to not having diabetes knowing what you know now. Now, I'm not trying to start that debate again, but I am curious about one thing.
What do you think of when you think of diabetes defining you (or your child)? What would having diabetes "define" you do? How does your perception of yourself change? What is it about you that makes you believe diabetes doesn't define you? Does the word "define" frustrate you? How do you convey the impact of diabetes on your life and how is this better/different than "define"? Why is "explain" or "a part" better? Is it better or is it just a euphamism for something we don't want to accept or acknowledge?
I'm not asking these as accusatory questions. I'm not trying to back you into a corner in order to get you to capitulate or believe something. But I keep hearing the words "diabetes doesn't define me" over and over again like a mantra, but I honestly don't understand what that phrase means. I'm trying to figure out how other people are looking at this in order to understand the statements people are making.
I'm wondering what it means to you.
Maybe when (if) I get feedback, I will post a little response and a bit more about what I think about diabetes and it's ability to define/explain me.
Ok. Ready, set, comment.
Edit: For more thoughts on this subject, feel free to blog-hop over to Kerri and Caro.
But I deleted the post (though not the actual essay, there is no way I'd be able to reproduce that analysis so it's hiding safely on my lime green jump drive) because I decided that I wasn't entirely clear what the question was.
The debate about "diabetes defining you" has been raging for quite a while. It started way back in the winter with the question of would you choose to not having diabetes knowing what you know now. Now, I'm not trying to start that debate again, but I am curious about one thing.
What do you think of when you think of diabetes defining you (or your child)? What would having diabetes "define" you do? How does your perception of yourself change? What is it about you that makes you believe diabetes doesn't define you? Does the word "define" frustrate you? How do you convey the impact of diabetes on your life and how is this better/different than "define"? Why is "explain" or "a part" better? Is it better or is it just a euphamism for something we don't want to accept or acknowledge?
I'm not asking these as accusatory questions. I'm not trying to back you into a corner in order to get you to capitulate or believe something. But I keep hearing the words "diabetes doesn't define me" over and over again like a mantra, but I honestly don't understand what that phrase means. I'm trying to figure out how other people are looking at this in order to understand the statements people are making.
I'm wondering what it means to you.
Maybe when (if) I get feedback, I will post a little response and a bit more about what I think about diabetes and it's ability to define/explain me.
Ok. Ready, set, comment.
Edit: For more thoughts on this subject, feel free to blog-hop over to Kerri and Caro.
posted by Allison at 5:02 PM
10 Comments:
I liked the statement "Diabetes does not define ____, it just helps explain a little about them." I do not believe that the words MS or Diabetes defines my hubby and son, I think that they are one thing of many that explains how they have come to where they are in their lives. Of the numerous pieces of their lives these happen to be ones that have a lot of influence on decisions made and attitudes towards life but I never believe ANYONE has one defining thing in their lives, we are more complex than that. Here is a quote for ya....
You play the hand you're dealt. I think the game's worthwhile. –
Christopher Reeve, 1952-2004, American Actor/Director/Lobbyist
To define is to determine or identify the essential qualities or meaning of. To explain is (among other things) to show the logical development or relationships of.
Under those rules, I hope that diabetes doesn't define me. It sure as heck explains a lot about who and where I am today, though!
I’m not sure if you read the blog post I made yesterday, but in that I stated that I’m not defined by diabetes, rather it is a part of me – and here you ask why “part” is better.
I’ve been looking at definitions for the word ‘define’
The OED says:
1. state or describe exactly the nature, scope or meaning of
2. mark out the limits of
Others I’ve found include:
3. To describe the nature or basic qualities of; explain:
4. To specify distinctly
5. To give form or meaning to
Diabetes doesn’t define me because the one word “diabetic” or the phrase “person with diabetes” cannot describe exactly, or specify distinctly, what I am. I am many other things besides: a woman, a daughter and granddaughter, a sister, niece and friend. I’m a dentist. I’m a literalist, a pedant and an optimist... I could go on forever. None of these other things ‘define’ me either. They are all just parts of who I am that make up a whole. I guess that is why I prefer to describe diabetes, and epilepsy, simply as a part of my life, like everything else. Certainly diabetes contributes a lot, which is part of what my post yesterday was about.
Sometimes when I look at it like this, I think of the question of whether diabetes defines anyone as totally pointless. I can’t see how it can be argued that it is the one dominant characteristic by which anyone can be described, and therefore as the way that anyone can be defined. We all have so much more to us. It is possibly an overused term, but is useful to me for reminding people that although at times I'm very focused on, even obsessed by, diabetes, it isn't the only aspect of my life. Since my blog is primarily about diabetes, I sometimes particularly feel the need to state this there, but I probably shouldn't. It should probably be obvious.
Definition three in the list above is the reason why I found it difficult to comment on Kerri’s post ‘Define. Or Explain?’ (I eventually didn’t – sorry Kerri.) I had trouble separating the meaning of the two words. I’m not sure that diabetes explains me as a person, but it certainly explains a number of things about me; why I have certain personality traits, both good and bad; why I worry about my health and try to look after myself, among others.
And as for number five in the list above, diabetes certainly doesn’t give meaning to my life. Love, for friends and family, love for my job, passion for issues close to my heart, including diabetes, and what I do with that passion – all these things make me love life and embrace it every day when I wake up. They give meaning to my life. Diabetes alone does not.
I agree with the previous comments. In fact, I couldn't agree more with Caro's assessment, which is so brilliantly stated that I have nothing else to add!
Me thinks that we over think some things at times. I think that everyone knew what was meant in Kerri's blog about the subject of "defining/explaining" someone who has diabetes. Why the big debate with dictionary terms????? My goodness...not everything needs to be disected to such a degree. We are who we are and how we arrived at being the people we are today is attributed to many things. The entry you deleted was a rambling of thoughts that I couldn't even follow. Sorry.
I took the Diabetes doesn't define me phrase as a declaration of "I am more than my disease." Of course you are. If you had cancer, that wouldnt' be all you were - a cancer patient, right? Same thing with diabetes, I feel.
Diabetes can explain you, though. It does permeate your life, it affects how you do everything, from minor things like running to the store (kit and juice? check), to major things, like a trip overseas (3 times as much stuff as you think you'll need? check). It can affect where you live, what you choose to do as a career and who you choose as a partner. It can influence decisions you make over the course of your life.
It is a part of you - sometimes a major part, sometimes a minor part, just like everything else in your life.
Do you, at any point, intend on referencing the blog posting from Six Until Me, which is the reason for your deleted and current post?
It's a shame for anyone who reads this post to be unaware that the original thought and concept came from another person. It's also unethical for you to take credit for the concept.
The define/explain concept has been done - and quite well, at that. Perhaps you could come up with something original.
I am a 3rd generation Diabetic. It doesn't define me, I define me. An illness is just that, an illness. We are all fighting for a little space in this world. It's what we do with that space, that counts.
Good grief. Can't we be civil here? Anonymous blogger, uncloak thyself!!!
Anonymous attack post just smack of cowardice. If you have a strong opinion about something, stand up for it, say who you are and say your piece. It's far too easy to sling barbs from behind a cloak of anonymity.
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